From now, im just gonna start blogging away like how i always did when i was younger. Well, at least, life seems manageable and less unhappy and pathetic then as compared to now. Over the years as i grew, i realised it’s never easy to catch up with myself when there are so many other things around me to attend to. So i hope to start all over again before i lose myself too much that im just another dead soul walking.
JOB.
Yes, it’s only a job, not even a career. Have been struggling to move on and out of my not-so-comforting comfort zone for a very long time but the end of time keeps furthering itself from me. I wish this time round il be able to tender without any worries by doing my best to clear however much work i can so my colleagues won’t have to pick up the pieces from my resignation. May i also put more effort in search of my new job, and hopefully, a better place where my money earned is meaningful. I’ve been stagnant for too long. Averagely decent salary for now, but not the way how i wanna earn it so meaninglessly. (Some people may just think im mad for not wanting to earn ‘easy money’, i know. It’s okay, cuz not until they realise how difficult it gets day by day, dreading to head to work, they won’t understand.)
Roof.
Urghh. So much has changed. When i first started on this blog, it was still HOME. Daddy, Mummy, my elder two sisters and me. Be it the good times or the bad times, i still miss when it’s the five of us. Daddy, all of us missed you since you left us last year. Though we weren’t the happiest family with only love under our roof, we were a family still deep in each of our hearts even when the divorce happened. Back when we moved out into aunt’s, we four ladies thought life was gonna be easier and less worrying given the situation we had then. Unfortunately, things took a wrong turn and we were under the control of my aunt instead. There, we swallowed much pride and finally the day came to a point we were shifting AGAIN after 6 years since we parted from Daddy. Now, it’s just 3 of us since eldest sissy is married and has her own place. I hope jS and i get ours soon so we could minimise on our current rental once the lease is due in Dec’17. It’s not too far away.. Also, im worried for Mummy and sissy whether they’ll be able to make it in getting themselves a NEW HOME and not just a temporary roof like how it is for us now. I need to find an alternative for there are a bit of issues even if my husband by then agrees still. Tough life having to make the best of both worlds. Till my balloting result is out.
People.
Well, im glad i finally understood why i don’t really need that many friends after all. Just a few true ones, that’s good enough. While my circle of friends are mostly busy growing up from graduating to starting a new career and maybe even committing to a new relationship, god knows whatever, i hope we could all catch up someday when most of us are more settled down for. Some others whom i got to know and became close with over the past few years, well, all i can say is i aint got time for ya’ drama if you expect me to treat you like royalty just because you think you’re older, matured(supposedly more than me) and experience life more than i have been. Sometimes, people just don’t reflect on themselves how annoyingly disgusting they behave towards others. I can be nicer than just nice, but so can i be really unspeakable of if you choose the wrong side outta me. Because you’re new, doesn’t mean you could step all over on me when i forgive. Cuz when im done with your nonsense, im outta it being very nasty to you. I can forgive time and again but il never forget. When i never forget, it’s when i stop forgiving. Lately, im done with some shithead and all that command aura where everyone else decides to let it eat them up slowly, maybe cuz they had yet to feel the pain they get for even being dead. Best luck to them, but i think it’s time i stop being nice to people who don’t deserve it even from anyone. Have been pathetic much uh? Moving on.
Status.
The exciting part…. I’M ENGAGED to one of the nicest man I’ve known! From all the mistakes i’ve made in the past to him having to tank all that nastiness i have inside me, im truly blessed, he stayed by me. Since he pushed the button on the box to propose with my dream ring, i cant contain the blissfulness within me and agreed. #luckiestbitchever Though at times it may seem that im abusing the love he has for me, but honestly it breaks my heart when i see his close friends taking him for granted so blatantly. I hope he truly understands it’s only because i care and that left him sandwiched instead. Anyhow, im really starting to enjoy myself being doted and loved by my fiancé. It’s been a long time since i suggested brunch when i was the idiot between us who started the idea on dates like that eating expensive food that aint all-the-time yummy or value-for-money. And i noticed how he tries to treat me to one for at least once a month. #littlethingslikethese I finally let go of what i needed to for the longest time after i decided to take away most of my insecurities and starting this new journey ahead with love. I have had loved someone so much so hard that i forget what it’s like to be loved by another. And with the insecurities living and sometimes even growing inside me, i lost the simplest me. Just really thankful that love picked me up and never left my side all these years, can’t ask for more.
Health.
Uhmmm. Still having sleeping issues, that i finally got the doctor to prescribe me some medicine to help regulate my sleep. Well, it fluctuates from time to time. Who knows what’s gonna happen next right? Speaking of which, it’s really late and i should try sleeping with my some help from the pills before im too tired to get up for work later..
Will be back soon.
Teressa's Nonsense 